I burnt the bridges. I didn’t know how much it would hurt. I didn’t know I would never forget. I didn’t know I would never let go. I stand on the other side of the broken bridge. A part of me still stands there. But it hurt so much to hold on. It hurt a lot to stand there. I underestimated the repercussions of that decision. That I would have to follow through with it every day.
Every time I see you, it creates a pit in my stomach. I carry it around the whole day. I can’t distract myself anymore. I am glad that you are not as active on social media as others. I get to escape you every now and then because of it. I am glad I stay so far away from you; I never have to worry running into you again. But there is also that other side to it. Now I know I will never be able to go back to you. Now I know we will never make up. Maybe… it is a good thing.
I am not sorry I did it. But I am still hurt. You did say you didn’t want me around. To my face. How does it matter what words you used. Maybe… I was oversensitive but you said it. To my face. So I decided to make a clean break. I decided to end it first. I still have my pride. It wasn’t as clean of a break as I had imagined. You still linger around in the back of my head, ready to pounce on and dampen my day. You have no idea. You really have no idea.