mirage of memories…

Those tiny few precious seconds between consciousness and sleep… the moments when I forget to keep control… your loss feels more real, more close, more suffocating… and I think, was it worth it to have made so many memories… to have to live with them… haunting the present… is it really worth it to have experienced so much, having seen life at its best… to have to live with just a shade of what it all could have been like. To know what lose feels like. If I had never experienced it all, I would never have known what giving it all up would feel like… will I be able to live the rest of my life in the shadows of the memories made… of having lost it all…

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